Back to work...

Dear Bug,

Tomorrow I go back to work for the first time in three months. I'm so grateful I've had this time with you but it's not enough. We waited SO very long for you, and it's not fair I now have to give you to someone else to spend time with all day long while I sit in an office dealing with people and things that aren't even a shade comparable to how important me being home nursing you is.

There are so many things I will miss about this time together. The late nights, you staring in to my eyes while nursing, knowing that I'm giving you everything you need in life to make you a happy and healthy little bug. The cooing, the kicking, the cuddling. Alternating nursing and sleeping in together. Mid-afternoon rendezvous in bed with snacks and boobies for you. Us spending the day together, going to see friends for lunch. Waiting for big brother to come home and spend time cuddling you. Then daddy coming home and loving on you. Just so many things I am going to miss.

I love you, Bug.

Kellen's Birth Story

My baby boy was born on September 9th, 2011. It was a scheduled c-section and he was 39 weeks cooked. Looking back, I wish I had waited until at least 40 weeks and will consider that for next time.

We arrived at the hospital super early, but we were still about 25 minutes late. I was having bathroom issues and was super nervous. When we got to the hospital, we waited in the waiting room for about 25 minutes (which made me not feel guilty about being late). Eventually a nurse came through and grabbed us on her way to clock in and worked in the recovery room.

We went back, and did the usual - put on the hospital gown, got the I.V., talked to the doctor. They had me walk down to the hall to the operating room. Just as the anesthesia guy was breaking out his stuff, it hit me that I HAD TO USE THE BATHROOM. I spoke up and was told that I'd have a catheter in soon...to which I had to explain that that wasn't the kind of bathroom run I had to make. So I toddled back to the recovery room and used the bathroom. A lot. To where the toilet stopped up. It was SO embarrassing! I let the nurse know, and then went back to the operating room.

They went ahead with the spinal block. It was a little pinchy painful when the shot went in my back but I was numb within a few minutes. Dr. Shin worked to get Kellen out. It took a while, and she explained that there were adhesion's and scar tissue that she had to cut through. The smell of the cauterizer wasn't so great. It felt like an eternity but finally Kellen was out! That first cry was amazing, but it was very gurgly. They had to suction his lungs out, and they said he was very covered with vernix.

It felt again like forever before I saw him. They kept suctioning him, and Dr. Shin took quite a while putting me back together. She said she put in a mesh cover to hopefully prevent my uterus from sticking to my abdominal wall again.

Finally they brought him to me, and he was BEAUTIFUL. Such a gorgeous baby! We went back to the recovery room, and they decided that he needed additional suctioning so someone from the NICU came down to continue that. There was talk of admitting him if he didn't reach certain milestones, but he met them and they were happy he could breathe well.

Meanwhile, Derek had to go use the restroom. He didn't know I had been in there, and he came back and said the toilet was all backed up but he flushed it and it went down. LOL About that time, four maintenance guys strolled in and went to go check it out but turned around and walked right back out. So embarrassing!! Clearly next time we'll be going on a liquid diet the day before. LOL

My baby was perfect, weighing in at 7lbs 1 oz and was 18.5 inches long. We were surprised he was so little, as I had had an ultrasound the week before and they indicated he was around 8 lbs.

And in other news...

My body has now decided that it should be possible to create another human being. Welcome back, AF!

Measurements...

At his one month appointment, he weighed in at 8 lbs 9 oz and was 22 inches long.

At his two month appointment, he weighed in at 10 lbs even, and was 22.5 inches long.

He started smiling/responding positively to things between weeks 9 and 10. He coos for daddy ALL the time, but not so much with Mommy. Soon!

We pretty much officially switched out of most of the newborn stuff at about 8 weeks.

He's going too quickly! Someone stop the time...less than 2 weeks until I go back to hell...I mean work.

Kellen Nicholas...

That is the name we finally decided on. It's official. I even got his social security card with it all official and stuff.

You see, while we were pregnant, we had the *hardest* time coming up with a name for this kid. Every time I suggested a name to Derek, he'd turn it down. "Too girly", or "I went to high school with a kid that had that name and he was an asshole", those kinds of comments. I finally decided this kid needed a name, or at least a nickname, and started calling him Hamlet. Which morphed in to Hamomlet when people kept asking my husband and I if we truly naming our son Hamlet. I can't tell you how many times we were asked that question.

As the weeks ticked by, we were really feeling the pressure. A lot of people thought we were being cloy with keeping our choice to ourselves...oh if only it were that simple. We were running out of time. Neither one of us were so quick to shoot each other's name suggestions down. We'd try some names on for a couple of days, but nothing felt right. We tried Colton out for a while. We thought we wanted a CJ name but it just wouldn't stick and sound like "it".

Then on Saturday, September 3rd, Derek and I were watching the Georgia/Boise game and we heard the name Kellen. Derek has always had an affinity for Boise state, so it didn't surprise me when he said he liked the name. I liked it too! Or at least didn't hate it, and with literally 6 days left until the kid was born, I didn't have any better suggestions or reasons not to like it. Success! It had the "c/k" sound like Caleb, was different and we didn't know a million people with it. With Caleb, I swear it wasn't on any lists the year I named him, and then suddenly that year, it exploded.

We were kicking around middle names, but again, nothing was sticking. We were getting our final "family of three" pictures taken at Picture People at the mall and Caleb said "How about Kellen Nicholas?" Perfect! I had considered Nicholas as a name, as Kellen was conceived on Christmas, but it was too common of a first name for me but *perfect* for a middle name.

So that's how we finally decided on a name...